One Ring to Rule them All

I'm doomed.

Gordon Brown is likely to take advantage of a Tory downturn to call a general election. People are saying it will be October.

October. Right about the time when I will be looking around, wondering what the hell I am doing in a foreign country all by myself.

Right about the time when I will be vulnerable to suggestion's like, "Hey, want to come and help us do the lobbying?"

It's happened before. Did I mention? It's how I ended up in Toronto in the first place. I came here first to help CLC carry out the lobbying for the 2000 federal election. It was taking the cork out of the bottle. Before that, I was no different (hey! no laughing!) from any other bone-headed Canadian. I paid almost no attention to politics.

Now it's happening all over again. When I read about the 9-point lead that Brown's got ahead of Cameron, something weird happened. I was up all night digging up information.

I just sent a note to my editor telling him that I'm going to be there in time to follow the election, that Dave Cameron's Tories are probably going to take a (well-deserved) pasting, that the Labour lunatics are probably going to double their current majority.

He said, "Good, start poking around and looking for candidates, relevant news, anything to get us started."

It was as if someone had said to a cocaine addict, "Don't worry, I'll pay you to shoot up, the more you do, the better."

And it was the happiest thing I've heard from them in weeks.

Gawd! But it gives me a teeth-gnashing thrill. Who needs drugs or sex, or sleep or food...?!

I'll never be able to kick this habit will I? There isn't any such thing as AA for political junkies.

I could be happy. I could be a milliner. I could get a corgi. I could live a nice quiet life.

It's possible...

But good grief, what a bore!